By Ged Barnes
Illustration: Louis Dyson
IN A world saturated by social media, it’s becoming increasingly easy to gauge the opinion of every Tom, Dick and José.
This particularly applies to football, with new journalists, pundits and ‘Einsteins’ popping up all over the show.
It’s easy to see why these wannabes are appearing more frequently than new Starbucks; the quality of punditry on the television and radio is bang average at best.
There are some cracking pundits of course; Danny Murphy, Rio Ferdinand, Gary Neville and Jamie Carragher all offer insightful opinion on a regular basis, but it appears that for every Gary Neville, there’s a Phil.
Poor Phil Neville, he always seems to be in the shadow of his older brother, even more so now than during their playing days.
With a voice that would send the dead to sleep, Phil seems to lack the spark needed to hold the attention of football fans. He may yet improve, or he may simply retire to his ‘not-as-eco-friendly-as-Gary’s’ manor.
At least Phil can draw attention to an impressive honours list to add some merit to his opinions.
Robbie Savage has one League Cup to his name, yet sits and criticises the world’s best for a living.
With more ridiculous statements than he had yellow cards, Savage personifies everything that is wrong with football punditry.
Brash, witless and ‘laddish’, Savage is the sole cause for mute buttons being pummelled within an inch of their life all over the country.
With the majority of Savage’s work being during commentary, at least we don’t have to look at him, unlike Paul Merson, whose bulbous head frequents many a television on a Saturday afternoon.
While the rest of the panel snigger at his pronunciation of the most difficult names(!), Merson shows that copious amounts of alcohol must still be running through his veins with his predictions.
At least he isn’t to be taken too seriously, unlike Garth Crooks.
Regularly voted the worst EVER pundit, Crooks must have some serious dirt on the top bods at the BBC.
His condescending tone on Football Focus and ridiculous selections for ‘team of the week’ provoke consistent ridicule, yet like the most stubborn of weeds, he manages to appear on our TV on a weekly basis.
So it’s easy to see why more and more football articles are appearing online, as the masses disagree with the punditry of ‘The Talking Dead’.
Like all the best dictatorships, however, this one will take some shifting. Best bring a spade.
*This article originally featured in Late Tackle. The next edition is available on April 20th.
