Like fingernails down a chalkboard, Sky’s latest advert for its football coverage caused many of us to wince. ASHLEY GREB was among those grimacing

AMAN stands alone, pensively holding his chin. The crowd en masse looks right. A boy nods at the imaginary ball, and then clutches his head like hundreds of others. Another man waves hands imploringly from balcony. A girl wrapped in a flag looks worried, and an old man wipes his eyes as a choir pipes up in the background. A boy can’t believe his eyes; there’s no net on the empty goal. Shot after shot of large crowds, stan...